An hour passed. I was, of course, awake. I checked my phone again, after having given Sammy space to write me the letter which was destined to be. According to those dots, she was still typing. I sent a supportive emoji…the smiley face encircled by hearts…feeling all the love. It was a good choice.
Immediately came her response, which I have copied here in its entirety because it is remarkable………
Your slender fingers
Sammy, a poem written for me
curl and tug around the edges
of my periphery. Yellow and white
light gapes in around the shadow
of your curious eye, and I
suddenly realize Myself,
perfectly naked and diffident
in a field of emptiness.
“You may have noticed that I was a little tongue tied when you were asking me about my creative endeavors the first time we met. I was stuck with talking material that was 2 yrs + old at this point, and I was having a hard time accounting for what I’ve been up to. While I immediately trusted you and felt like I wanted to unfold before you, there are extra large parts of my story that are intertwined with Superbloom, and to tell it puts us both in a vulnerable position, and so I don’t feel I can make that decision to share all the things without her consent.
“Superbloom has said she trusts me but thinks that maybe I am jumping the gun. I feel like, given the fast feeling of significance, I need to be transparent with you so you have a chance to consider and consent, should that be right for you. This will ultimately allow me to set my compass in a way that best serves you and your family.
“For the past 2 yrs, Superbloom and I have chosen to apply our capacities for creativity and growth and deep love in our dynamic relationship(s) with ourselves, each other, and others. Some labels people might put on what we’ve been engaged in…ethical non-monogamy, relationship anarchy, polyamory, conscious relationships. Whatever the label you want to put on it, it is really about designing and building mutual and deeply satisfying relationships that allow for our most bodacious soul’s expression. What this looks like depends entirely on each individual.
“This brings me to my experience of you. For some reason, I want to know and be known by you. I notice in me a spark, a desire that attunes me to my vital center. I feel more alive somehow. My stomach does involuntary flips with certain responses that I receive from you. My body floods with tingling heat. I recently read something that felt really right to me: ‘Desire is perfectly pure the way that fire is. Blazing energy. Destructive only when we handle it wrongly.’ It describes my experience so well.
“When I heard the framing that Wellwood mentioned about a soul connection being two people who are instrumental in each other’s development, my hairs went on end. He went further to say it would be ‘someone who doesn’t just make us feel good, but someone who will make us live and die most intensely.’ I have NO idea how I sense that about you, but there it is. We can take it or leave it.
“Meeting you has cracked something open in me, and I am endlessly grateful. I have often said that Superbloom makes it easy for me to access my capacity for infinite Love. Indeed, ‘the gate of heaven is everywhere,’ and it seems there are some that just make it easier to see it.
“Please, if you can, lay your people pleaser aside (assuming you have one like the rest of us). I am not under any delusion that you feel the same way or are in a place in your life to engage with such adventures. We can celebrate and move forward with enthusiastic yeses..and we can be guided by our nos. I promise to be sensitive and utterly respectful of where you’re at.
“Clumsy and incomplete but from my heart in this moment.”
[Mic drop.]
Ladies and Gentlemen…I present to you: Sammy.
Previous –> 15…bless us. Next –> 17…it’s on.
